The Male Lead Knelt Before Me
Vol. 17: Where You Are
“You mean a child?”
Caleb looked greatly embarrassed. His uneasiness could be seen on his troubled face.
I’m not in a similar circumstance, but I wondered if my look was similar when the emperor first asked me.
“If you’re asking my opinion…… First and foremost, I have rather positive thoughts about a child.”
Hmm, I see.
If I told him what the emperor told me, it wouldn’t matter, right?
That was the moment I realized it.
Caleb said while delicately taking my hand.
“But I would prefer that you prioritize your opinion over mine.”
“What is my opinion?”
“The child will undergo many abrupt changes. And……”
He added after pausing for a moment.
“That change will most likely affect you more than I do. There must be a lot of things that are difficult to deal with. I’m afraid you’ll suffer greatly as a result of it.”
It was a sweet response. To the point where I feel bad for asking him without giving it any thought.
What I asked Caleb was light thoughts.
Just like the emperor when he asked me if I had any future plans.
Of course, I didn’t think deeply and was only curious about what the emperor meant.
That was definitely the case.
Caleb strengthened his grip on my hand.
His black eyes, staring at me, revealed a steely determination.
“Please let me know if you had any worries or didn’t like it at all.”
“I will do as you wish.”
“Even if I don’t really want to have a child?”
“I would be happy to do so.”
It was an immediate response.
It never occurred to me that Caleb wasn’t interested in children.
He already stated that he had positive thoughts about it.
I had a sense that he was trying hard not to express himself for my sake.
“To be honest, I apologize. I should not have allowed you to bring it up first. It’s entirely my fault.”
How can that be Caleb’s fault?
For a moment, I felt something strange.
Should I say that the flow of the conversation appears to have diverted?
“Why is Caleb at fault?”
“This was the result of my carelessness and negligence. I should have to fully explain it to you and examine the situation.”
It was extremely strange at this point.
It wasn’t just my intuition. It was undeniable.
We were talking, but it wasn’t a conversation.
He seemed to be trying to console and reassure me.
“Wait a minute, Caleb.”
I reached for Caleb’s hand as soon as the thought occurred to me.
Caleb then glanced at me as if to ask why.
“I’m really just asking in case.”
“What you just said, aren’t we just talking about having a child? You didn’t think I had a child, did you?”
Caleb’s face flushed with shame as soon as the question was posed.
He looked so flustered that it couldn’t be compared to when I asked what he thought about the child earlier.
“…… Was it not that?”
“Of course, not.”
I wasn’t expecting his thinking that way.
‘It’s no surprise it was strange.’
But I couldn’t blame Caleb.
It wasn’t necessary, but it was my fault if I had to look at the wrong thing.
‘I didn’t recognize it when I asked him……’
I just realized after seeing Caleb’s reaction.
How ambiguous the phrase “what do you think about children” sounds.
“Then why are you suddenly talking about the child?”
“Today, His Majesty wants my child to be declared his successor, so he asked if I had any plans to have a child.”
“Is that why you asked me?”
“That too…… I was just curious.”
I didn’t mean to, but I twitched her fingers unintentionally.
‘I would have drunk myself and talked if I had known this was going to happen.’
It was still an unfamiliar and embarrassing subject for me to speak soberly.
Though I already talked about it, I needed to finish it.
“The story of a child is a vague imagination. Actually, I have no plans to have children right now. But I believe you should be aware of what His Majesty told me, and one day……”
“You don’t need to say anything else. I understand how you feel. “Didn’t I promise?”
“That I will do as you wish.”
I shut my mouth.
Caleb seemed to understand what I was thinking even though I didn’t say anything else.
Aside from that, I opened my mouth carefully and curiously.
“Caleb, have you ever considered it? Um, I mean, um.”
About our future.
And about having a child.
The question I wanted to ask surged to the top of my throat.
But I couldn’t get it out of my mouth.
That’s when I finally shut up.
“Is it even possible for me to not think about it?”
The voice was gentle and full of affection.
“I’ve always considered it. Since the moment I realized I had feelings for you, and even now that we’re together like this.”
A large hand reached out and gently curled around my cheek.
“Who would my child look like if I had one?”
Caleb shook his head.
I closed my eyes reflexively as he approached, and his lips lightly caressed my eyelids.
“If they looked like you, would they have these eyes?”
Even though his lips parted in an instant, my heartbeat increased.
My eyelashes trembled along with my pounding heart.
“Would they have the same nose and lips as you?”
Meanwhile, Caleb lowered his face and kissed me. His hands, which were wrapped around my cheek, held the back of my head up.
The kiss was a little longer than when it touched my eyelashes.
Caleb moved his face away after a kiss so frantic that I couldn’t feel the evening breeze between winter and spring that had been in the air for a long.
I asked, my gaze drawn to Caleb’s slightly flushed face.
“So Caleb wants to have a child who looks like me?”
“That’s how I felt when I first thought about it.”
Caleb gave a warm smile.
“I don’t think it matters right now. No matter who the child resembles, what gender they are, or what personality they have.”
“Even if the child has no blood connection with me, it doesn’t matter.”
It took me a while to comprehend his last words.
Then, when I deduced an answer, I couldn’t help but be surprised.
“Have you ever thought about adopting a child?”
“I thought it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if having a child was a burden for you.”
I was at a loss for words.
This is because I couldn’t think of anything to say because I had so many thoughts and questions.
But the hustle and bustle in my head vanished as soon as I heard Caleb’s words.
“Anyway, the fact that it’s our child doesn’t change.”
A natural smile spread across my face, referring to Caleb’s conclusions.
“I had a similar thought.”
I reached out and placed my arms around Caleb’s face this time.
“Whether the child resembles Caleb or me. “What kind of personality will the child have?”
I was genuinely curious if the child will be born with silver hair or black eyes.
“At first, I felt it would be good if the child was quieter and calmer. They will be easier to raise that way. But……”
I smiled as I saw Caleb’s questioning eyes on me.
“Just the fact that it is our child.”
“So I reasoned that none of them mattered. I’ve never contemplated adopting a child, but I’ve had the same thoughts as you.”
Caleb smiled briefly and grabbed my hand, wrapping it around his face and leading it to his lips.
There was a slight rough touch on the palm of my hand.
The hot breath and the sensation of the lips were so close that I flinched without even recognizing it.
But I didn’t pull out my hand.
I just leave my hand to Caleb.
Her lips, which progressively lowered, delicately kissed each part of my hand.
Then, for some reason, when his lips touched my wrist, it tickled me.
Caleb opened his eyes slightly and glanced at me as I laughed and giggled.
Our gazes were entwined in the air, and I still smiled at him.
“Shall we get married?”
The touch that had been on my wrist ended in an instant.
Instead, I could only see Caleb’s eyes widening as if surprised.
I was able to speak calmly, unlike Caleb, who seemed taken aback by the reaction I expected.
“I’ve been thinking a lot…… But it always comes to the same conclusion.”
I never imagined a future with someone before, but now I can’t image my life without Caleb.
No, it’s more accurate to say that I don’t even want to think about such a future.
I understand that marriage is not the end of a relationship.
However, I wished for a deeper and more defined relationship than this.
“I think I can’t without Caleb. No, it’s a certainty that I can’t.”
“That also goes for me. I can’t without you.”
His grip on mine had been slightly tightened.
“I have always lived as a knight for His Majesty and the people of the Empire. I thought it would be like that for the rest of my life until I met you.”
“But that thought has changed since I met you.”
My existence has changed his thoughts.
Is there another word that’s as sweet as this?
Caleb abruptly let go of my hand and stood up. He then took the sword from his waist and held it in both hands.
Even as I remained there watching, I couldn’t figure out what Caleb was up to.
However, his expression appeared solemn, so I decided to keep an eye on him.
Caleb knelt on one knee, holding his sword in his hand.
His long uniform cape falls against the ground.
His deep-set black eyes peered up at me.
“I dare to hope, I’d like to place you on top of this sword I’ve been carrying all of my life. I intend to wield the sword for you out of desire, not out of duty, for as long as the rest of my life permits.”
He asked, holding the handle and the point of the blade with a slight unshakeable posture.
“Will you give me permission?”
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